The Content Jedi Blog

Marketing needs to have a Come-To-Jesus with itself over blandvertising.
You’ve seen it. You’ve scrolled past it. You’ve maybe even written it (no judgment). It’s the copy equivalent of room-temperature water. Not offensive, but definitely not memorable.
It’s everywhere:

“We’re passionate about delivering innovative solutions that drive success.”

“We empower clients to reach new heights.”

“We’re committed to excellence and customer satisfaction.”

Snooze. Swipe. Unsubscribe.

This kind of language is corporate beige wallpaper. It says absolutely nothing, and worse, it says it in the same way everyone else does.

What Is Blandvertising?

Blandvertising is what happens when marketing is afraid to stand out.
It’s:

• Trying to sound professional but ending up robotic
  
  
• Prioritizing buzzwords over clarity
  
  
• Writing for what you think people want to hear instead of what they actually care about
  
  
• Telling stories without a point or not telling stories at all
  
  

It’s when your brand voice gets neutered by internal approvals, brand guidelines, and the fear of offending someone who hasn’t bought from you yet.
And…it’s why your audience tunes out.

Why Bland Doesn’t Work

Bland doesn’t spark emotion, inspire action, or build trust.
People remember brands that sound like people. They remember brazen opinions, weird analogies, and clarity.
What they don’t remember is “empowering synergistic growth via customer-centric methodologies.”

The Bold Alternative

You have to sound different to be remembered.
Start with:

 🔥 Saying what you actually mean
 🔥 Swapping fluff for specificity
 🔥 Writing like you talk
 🔥 Having a clear point of view
 🔥 Infusing energy, humor, or honesty, whatever your brand allows

Instead of “We provide innovative web solutions,” try:  “We build websites that don’t suck and actually convert.”

Instead of “Committed to customer satisfaction,” try:  “We answer every client email within 24 hours, even on Mondays.”

Blandvertising is  brand-eroding.

You’ve worked too hard to sound like everyone else. Take a red pen to the tired jargon, pour some punch back into your message, and give people a reason to remember you.

Want help making your content sound less like a policy memo and more like a brand people care about?

Let’s talk. Give me a shout: 224-645-2748 | david@davidtelisman.com.

About the Author, David Telisman

I am a Writer and Content Creator, and I work with businesses to inspire their customers to buy from them. I believe that my clients deserve to feel proud of how their content marketing looks and what it says, and I deliver by providing expert copywriting and marketing solutions.

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